Reflections from the Heart

It is absolutely gorgeous outside here in beautiful Virginia today. I am blessed to have a glorious lake in my back yard which I retreat to in order to find solace and peace in the moments I need them most.

I have found myself coming to this dock to channel my deepest pains from many traumatic experiences from my life. During life's challenges, I found here I could channel my deepest emotions and pains into my writings. I would spend hours on this dock writing and crying and allowing myself to feel what I needed to purge from my emotional body.

Funny how life is. I am now blessed to live at this place and visit daily to reflect on life and all the lessons I've learned and am still learning. I am finding myself at more peace than ever with life’s challenges and transitions.

I now practice yoga ands meditation on the dock to truly allow my emotions to arise and to connect with my spirit and the Divine source of the Universe. I love to watch the sun reflect off of the water. It looks like diamonds sparkling and reminds me of dancing stars and crystals. I am reminded that I am alive in this moment and grateful for my ability to see this phenomena and to connect with what this moment means to me. I hear from a source of higher wisdom that teaches me to let go and just breathe.

I believe in the moments we are alone with ourselves, we can have incredible realizations of self and what we call life. I truly have learned to become my best friend and my love my own company. I believe we can all learn from one another and I believe connecting with other humans and learning from one another is important to our development and learning how to have and show compassion for one another. I have found that the most powerful realization and moments of awakening I have had come from having time to reflect alone. Just me and the source that upholds the universe. I am able to hear words of Divine infinite wisdom that flow from source to me and allow me to find such peace within.

It is a beautiful relationship and one that each of us must learn to cultivate and nurture each and every day. When our relationship with our Source and our selves is strong and loving and healing, then can we go out and share that same experience with the world and all we meet.

I recently began to deeply reflect on my emotional attachments to relationships I have had, with men in particular.

I pride myself on making healthy, empowering choices with what I put in my body as far as food goes, but my relationships with men were not matching with my health choices. I gave up eating dairy, meat, alcohol, sugar, caffeine, and processed foods years ago, but here I was eating "emotional" poison through having relationships with emotionally abusive men! I was involved in relationships with men that made me feel ill and not good about myself. I was choosing men that abused me and hurt me. I was so fully aware of my physical relationship with food and choosing a higher, pure way of eating , that I failed to truly reflect on my emotional diet with my relationships with men.

This was an awakening and powerful realization for me. Once I saw my behavior patterns and how I was eating emotional poison, I knew I had to stop or else my spirit would be robbed of all the beauty and love that I knew I needed and deserved. I was addicted to this type of behavior in men, due to my "blueprint" of being emotionally and physically abused since I was a child and all of my teen years and young adult life. Honestly up until this point! That has been a HUGE realization and step in my healing from the pain I allowed to continue in my life.

I am still coming out of the shadows, and stepping into the sunlight that warms my soul and brings me life. I know it is a process and with each new day I am telling myself I am stronger and braver than I was the day before. The relationships that were abusive, both physically and emotionally took their toll but they taught me how to stand in my strength and honor my spirit and soul. The lessons in life are just that. Lessons. We must all take time to reflect upon our journeys and give thanks for what we have learned.

I hear a hawk in the distance as I sit here and breathe in this glorious day. Hawks remind me to give thanks for life and the awakening I have had and the growth and blossoming I have experienced. I choose to share, in hopes that I reach others in need of hearing what I am sharing. I am grateful that I am here. Now. In this very moment, connecting with higher wisdom that I allow to flow freely through me and into my words.

I say this right now to anyone reading this that is, or knows someone who is in an emotionally or physically abusive relationship, YOU are worth so much more than what you may know. Tell yourself while looking in the mirror, into your OWN eyes, that you love and honor yourself and that you are brave and courageous and strong and can find the love you are looking for INSIDE and through your divine connect with your source. Some people call that source God but to me that name changes often until I find what suits me. You may feel the same way and need to find a name for what you refer to and call "God".

We are aspects of the Divine creation and we have more power than we realize. We have the power to change in an instant, with our realizations of self and we have the power to make the conscious decisions to be better each day. The past cannot define you. It is your conscious daily actions to be better and acting upon that, that will bring about great change. YOU have that power through your willingness and openness to bring only goodness into your world, if you wish.

My wish for you is that today bring you peace you have never known and for the moments to reflect on your life. For you to hear wisdom from above and may it fill your being with bliss and awareness. May you find the courage in your heart to bring about change that feeds and nurtures your heart and soul! Today and always, in ALL ways!